Letting Go of Stuff, Part One

How to identify what is holding you back and how to let it go

By Holli Kenley

letting go

Any time of year is a great time to make changes, by letting go of things in your life that are not working for you. Here are some simple tips on how to get going.

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What you could be  letting go of

  • A person or people – a toxic relationship, an unhealthy partner, a dysfunctional family member, a negative group.
  • A place or thing – the memory of or a tangible reminder of an environment or person that is harmful or unpleasant.
  • An idea or thought – negative life messages, worry, pessimism.
  • An emotion, attitude or feeling – regret, guilt, grief, anger, blame, self-doubt, disappointment.
  • A habit – rescuing unhealthy individuals, overcommitting, working too many hours, not eating right or exercising enough, and so on.

In order to get started, it is important is that we spend some time thinking about how we are feeling. Give yourself permission to take a brutal and honest inventory.

Ask and answer these questions.

  • What is working for me in my life?
  • What or who is contributing to my well-being – augmenting my wellness, enhancing my sense of worth and of self, and fueling me in healthy ways?
  • Along with that, what is not?
  • What or who is depleting me – taking away my energy, draining my resources, and diminishing my capacity for inner peace, balance, and joy?

Take your time, but do spend time completing this exercise.  This is Step One in  letting go of stuff.

Wellness – like anything else – takes hard work. Let’s start today.


This exercise is so important. Over the next week, take your self-inventory and write down  what or who is not working for you. You are not being selfish – you are taking care of you.

Next time, we will move on the Step Two – Ways of Letting Go of Stuff!

Publisher’s Note: Holli Kenley is an American Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and the author of “ Daughters Betrayed By Their Mothers: Moving from Brokenness to Wholeness” and “Power Down & Parent Up!: Cyber Bullying, Screen Dependence & Raising Tech-Healthy Children”

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How to identify what is holding you back and how to let it go.